Being Her Solider

If I were to describe my relationship with my Mother, Bast-Mut, besides the obvious of being Her daughter, I would describe it as both loving as well as formal. She is still Bast, retaining all the love and joy that is within Her domain, but in Her role as Queen, She is demanding of respect and reverence. She doesn’t allow me to make excuses most of the time, and yet I still do in some cases (I’m working on that.)  If I have a full bath or shower present, I’m required to do the full purification before senut and I’m not allowed to shorthand that.  Despite many of these small requirements, I am also Her child and She does relax Her rules when She knows I’m doing my best with what I have.

She is warm and accepting, and there are many times where I’ve felt Her actually embrace me while in shrine.  In Her presence, I am brought to tears, making me shake a little, making it hard to speak.  I feel Her piercing gaze seeing the whole of who I am, and loving me despite my flaws.  As other children of Mom have stated, She is kind of hard to grasp at times and can be hard to define.  Get to know Her children in order to understand Her.  All I can work from are my own experiences. That is enough for me.

And yet, I am still Her soldier, and my duty is to Her and to Ma’at.always.  This is the formal part of our relationship.  I’m still to watch my actions, to help and aid others when I can, and to perform on Her behalf.  I know that it is in my future to become a priest, and I know it is Her will to have me continue to serve both Herself and the community. I have many years to go, but She is a Goddess, and She is ever patient.

She is the joy and light of my life, and if I ever stray and feel that all is just my imagination, She steps in with both a hug and perhaps the smallest of slaps like a mama cat would to her kitten.  Shame on me for thinking She wasn’t there!  She is the flame that keeps me going on the darkest of days, and I am ever blessed to have Bast-Mut in my life.

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